Advertisement in a Long Island Shop:Guitar, for sale....... Cheap...........no strings attached.
Ad In Hospital Waiting Room:Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At A Time!
On a bulletin board:Success Is Relative. The more The Success, The more The Relatives.
(they will look for you..)
When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...I Gave Up Reading .
My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses...He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.
You Know Your kids Have Grown Up When:Your Daughter Begins To Put On Lipstick..
Or when your Son starts To wipe It Off.
Sign In A Bar:'Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please do Pay In Advance.'
Sign In Driving School:If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way.
Behind Every Great Man:There Is A Surprised Woman.
The Reason Men Lie Is Because:Women Ask too Many Questions.
Getting Caught:Is The Mother Of Invention.
Laugh And The World Laughs With You,Snore And You sleep Alone.
Sign At A Barber's Saloon In Detroit :We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.
A Traffic Slogan:Don't Let Your Kids Drive If They are Not Old Enough
Or Else They Will Never Be.
Sign In A Restaurant:All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.
Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window:Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out From Here.
She May Be Your Grandmother !
